"RULES OF ESTRANGEMENT: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict"
- Jan 31, 2021
- 2 min read
Updated: Feb 27, 2021
Penguin/Random House announces this greatly anticipated book will be published in March, and is available for pre-order.
What are they saying?
-From Lori Gottlieb, psychotherapist and New York Times bestselling author of MAYBE YOU SHOULD TALK TO SOMEONE:
"Finally, here's a hopeful, comprehensive, and compassionate guide to navigating one of the most painful experiences for parents and their adult children alike."
-~From Michelle Kuo, Reading with Patrick: A Teacher, a Student, and a Life-Changing Friendship: "I loved this book. I loved its bravery and kindness, its storytelling and passion, its personal vulnerability and professional confidence, its historical insight and concrete advice for struggling families. Most of all I loved the compassion that Coleman clearly has for every family member who walks into his therapist's office."
-From Gabriel Byrne, Golden Globe Winning Star of HBOs In Treatment
“I found this book utterly engrossing. Dr Coleman writes accessibly with compassion and rare insight. It will be a comfort to those seeking answers to one of the most misunderstood and complex emotional issues facing many families today.“
-From Stephanie Coontz, author, The Way We Never Were: American Families and the Nostalgia Trap:
"Coleman addresses what historians see as a strange paradox: Even as more adult children than ever before view their parents as friends rather than mere obligations, psychologists report seeing a wave of parents who have been rejected by their adult children and of young adults who insist they need their parents out of their lives."
-From Amy J.L. Baker, Ph.D., author of "Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome: Breaking the Ties that Bind": . “Dr. Coleman has written a very thoughtful book filled with great wisdom and care. He tackles many facets of ruptured relationships between parents and their adult children."
-From Frank Furstenberg, Zellerbach Family Professor of Sociology, Emeritus, University of Pennsylvania:
“With the authority and wisdom that comes from both a firm grounding in history, sociology, and, especially, clinical practice, Joshua Coleman provides compassionate and useful advice to parents and their adult children who are trying to navigate the minefield of past family experience." PRE-ORDER
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This was a really thoughtful article, and I appreciate how it explains estrangement not just as a conflict, but as a complex emotional process that often builds over years. From some of the research I’ve done and conversations I’ve had while working around family communication topics, one thing that seems to help during difficult conversations is creating a calm, comfortable environment where people actually feel safe enough to talk openly. It sounds simple, but small environmental factors can really affect our mood and patience levels. For example, I’ve experimented quite a bit with different smart-home setups in my own space, and even something practical like a smart remote for AC can make a difference because it lets you quickly adjust the…
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